Assume…the most dangerous word
to take for granted or without proof.
ASSUME:1. Believing that you know everything to the point to where it can harm you or work against you.
Synonyms 6. assume, Pretend, affect, feign imply an attempt to create a false appearance. To assume is to take on or put on a specific outward appearance, often (but not always) with intent to deceive: to assume an air of indifference. To pretend is to create an imaginary characteristic or to play a part: to pretend sorrow. To affect is to make a consciously artificial show of having qualities that one thinks would look well and impress others: to affect shyness. To feign implies using ingenuity in pretense, and some degree of imitation of appearance or characteristics: to feign surprise.
~You assume your coworker doesn’t need ‘that’ so you take it home, only to leave them incapable of doing their job and having to turn away clients.
~You assume that your friend is mad at you because they are being short, only to find out later that they have been dealing with stressful family issues.
~You assume your boss feels appreciated so you throw all your ideas at them, when really all they hear is that what they are doing isn’t good enough.
~You assume your mother doesn’t care because she hasn’t called, only to find out how upset she has been lately with some new ‘stress factors ‘.
~You assume people are talking about you, when in reality its all in your head.
Assumptions normally derive from feelings…your personal feelings. According to how you feel about a situation or a person, even unrelated events that have left you feeling a certain way. Look at the definitions above…do you see anything positive? NO! Because Assume is the most dangerous word. It leads to false blaming, feelings being hurt, withdrawing from people, relationships being broken, business being corrupted. There is nothing good that can come from an assumption.
STOP! Be aware of when you start to assume. And dig deep to figure out where those feelings are coming from.
COLLABORATE! Have someone to hold you accountable that can tell you if its in your head or not. OR go directly to the person you are assuming something about and confront them. Work with others to get your answers, even if it feels like giving in to enemies.
LISTEN! Hear out the people you have put in place to hold you accountable and those you must confront. Listen thoroughly to help yourself understand if what you were feeling is valid or not. If you do not listen then you will not stop feeling ‘that way’ and the assumptions will take root and grow a whole new life.
stop, collaborate, and listen (Thank you Vanilla Ice)
assuming leads to nothing good